Never go to bed angry

by Nina

Santa Barbara Botanical Gardens: A Detail by Joan Webster

On Tuesday I read a short little piece in the NY Times questioning the adage “Never go to bed angry” (see here). It was one of those bottom line pieces, and the bottom line was this:

“Going to sleep upset or disturbed preserves the emotion, research suggests.”

In the cited study in The Journal of Neuroscience, scientists exposed 106 men and women to images that elicited various emotions. In some cases the emotions were negative and in other cases the emotions were positive or neutral. The researchers then looked at what happened 12 hours later when the subjects were shown both new images and the previous ones, either in the morning after a night of sleep, or at the end of a full day of wakefulness. The conclusion was:

“The scientists found that staying awake blunted the emotional response to seeing the upsetting images again. But when the subjects were shown the disturbing images after a night of sleep, their response was just as strong as when they had first seen them—suggesting that sleep “protected” the emotional response.”

That doesn’t sound good, does it? Going to bed angry and waking up angry is not only an unpleasant experience for you, but it probably doesn’t enhance your relationships with the people around you. Besides, it's also not a good idea to go to bed angry if you are concerned about getting a good night's sleep. Your stress levels will be high and your sleep, if you can sleep, will be restless—maybe filled with upsetting dreams—and you won’t feel rested in the morning.

But very probably you—unlike the people in the study—can’t just put away an “upsetting image” when you are very angry. In fact, the chances are you’ll keep having one angry thought after another, and with each angry thought you’ll get another jolt of adrenaline (that’s why they call it the “fight or flight response,” people), keeping your stress levels as high as they were before.

The good news is that Baxter says it takes only about 90 seconds to clear the adrenaline released in your system by an angry thought if you switch to a more neutral topic. So to put away your anger, he recommends a structured breath practice, in which you measure your inhalations and exhalations, and count your breaths to engage your mind. If you combine this type of breath practice with a supported inversion (such as Legs Up the Wall pose) or a supported forward bend (if you find those soothing), both of which help switch your nervous system to relaxation mode, you’ll get a double dose of calm.

You could also use a guided relaxation (see here) as a way to engage your mind and relax your nervous system at the same time.

Yoga for Emotional Wellbeing: An Epiphany

by Nina

Sand Dollar by Melina Meza

I don’t have a particularly exciting story about why I started practicing yoga. (It’s kind of humorous actually. When I was in my late twenties, I was working at a small software company and we wanted to start an on-site exercise class. One of our co-workers said that his wife could come and teach us, so we decided to give it a go. We had no idea she was a yoga teacher! So there we were, for our first class, and she asked us to stand in “Mountain pose,” with our big toes together and our heels slightly apart, which was the opposite of the foot position I was used to doing in ballet and modern dance, my previous forms of preferred exercise. And just standing that way felt so wonderful for my body, I thought, whatever this is, this is for me!). However, I do have a more dramatic story about why I decided to become a yoga teacher.

During the period when I was studying yoga with Rodney Yee and writing our first book together, Yoga: The Poetry of the Body, Rod helped me understand how my yoga practice was benefiting me in emotional and spiritual ways, as well as physical ones. It turned out that by practicing regularly at home—something I had taken up intuitively rather than with any specific goals in mind—I had been learning to manage my stress, balance my emotions and cultivate equanimity without even realizing it. (If you read the dialogues in the book Yoga: The Poetry of the Body, you can witness Rod helping me toward that realization.) And as someone who had suffered in the past from chronic stress (working full time at a software start-up while raising two children!), which had led to a bout of agitated depression, I began to see the tremendous power yoga had for helping people with emotional difficulties of all kinds, including stress, depression, anxiety, anger, and general dissatisfaction or unhappiness.

Then, one morning when I was practicing yoga with Rod and his best friend, Ian, Ian began talking about how he had just learned that a colleague of his had committed suicide.  (Yes, sorry to disillusion you, those guys chatted constantly while they were practicing.) And while I was in Shoulderstand, I kept thinking about about Ian’s story, and filled with compassion for his friend—for the suffering he must have experienced to lead him to take his life—I began to cry. I realized then that while I could not help Ian’s friend, I did have quite a lot of knowledge that I could use to help other people who were suffering. And while I had no particular ambition to become a yoga teacher per se, I understood at that moment that I really should look into finding a way to share what I knew. Yes, it was one of those actual epiphanies (and I had it while I was doing a yoga pose).

After that, I started doing two things. First, I began taking as many workshops as I could from teachers like Patricia Walden, who teaches workshops on Yoga for Depression (I took that more than once!) and Yoga for Emotional Healing, and Roger Cole, who teaches about the physiology of inversions. Then, I enrolled in a three-year teacher training program at The Yoga Room, in Berkeley. Clearly I believe in being thoroughly prepared! Finally, when I felt ready (and when I got the go-ahead from Patricia, who was informally mentoring me) I did begin teaching workshops on Yoga for Emotional Wellbeing, Yoga for Stress and Yoga for Better Sleep. Those were rewarding—there is nothing like having even just one person tell you that you made a difference in their lives by teaching them a simple practice, like breath awareness—and I still teach them occasionally. But I eventually realized that writing is still my forte and that I could reach a larger audience through my writing than by teaching local workshops.

When Baxter and I came up with the idea of starting a blog, I realized that a blog could be the perfect venue for me; having our own blog would allow me to give myself the power to write about what I wanted to write about, the way I wanted to write about it (frankly, the way some publications edit/rewrite you can be positively painful). And because the blog was free and accessible world wide, I could reach people who would never be able to study with me in person.

Because I not only write for the YFHA blog but I’m also the Editor in Chief, I work on the blog at least five days a week (and sometimes behind the scenes on the weekends). And that takes a lot of dedication. But that original epiphany I had in Shoulderstand and my ongoing passion for sharing what I know about the emotional and spiritual benefits of yoga—as well as the physical ones—are a wellspring that never runs dry.

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